I find for me i am on a roller coaster always, travelling well sometimes and then it all creeps back...its great that you are able to acknowledge when its creeping back....when im in that situation i need to distract my thoughts from falling too deep too dark...by doing anything at all..i struggle with motivation so if i cant get myself out of the house, i will write, or clean up, or move around furniture, have heaps of showers, read, sing anything at all that is around me i will try and make sure that i get occupied that i distract my thoughts enough to pass. Sometimes when its really bad i go to the doctor especially if i cant get in to see my councellor. When its early enough stages where i am first picking up the signs or triggers thats spiraling deep again i do what ever i can to breath, yep breath fresh air, if theres a park nearby, a beach nearby, some where you are able to sit quietly and just breath it helps. Also in the first stages of noticing it coming back, i force myself to write a 'gratitude list' no matter how big or small i right things i can be greatful for eg. clean drinking water, food, shoes, ... once i start writing the basics the list then gets easier and bigger after a while this exercise helps..
Goodluck, we can hear you we hear your voice , its hard its real hard but you are here and you are cared about, you are not alone, you are worth life xx
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