Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

[Lizard]

if they have other diabilities, mental health issues; they fail to comprehend how much they are endangering themselves.. my sonm stopped his Malaria tablets 2 days b4 we left africa and he was meant to keep taking them for 2wks when we returned as well!!

[Yabitha]

hello. 

I think there is fear and alot of it.

Of being exposed as not coping and that becoming a threat to their sense of control.

Nobody really likes feeling out of control or of having their own control over their own life, taken away.

Its a confidence issue too and the defensive stance of saying "I dont need help" means that they are able to acknowledge their own confidence. To be "found out" as being mentaly ill needing help is a huge blow to your confidence, even when you are actually unwell.

There are fears about having to give up our powers, over our medical care, as mentioned above, and having to take drugs that we dont like because of their side effects. 

Basically human beings dont like being called stupid at any time. Pointing out your friend or relative is showing signs they are mentally ill or obviously needing help, is like calling them stupid. You need to have tact about it.

[Lizard]

my 1st Forum 2

[Flick88]

I have a teenager who doesn’t want help even though her life is an absolute mess.

[DaisyMay]

Same with my daughter! Refuses to accept help in the form of prescription drugs...but is fine with self-medicating with marijuana!

[Lizard]

same here

[Lizard]

it's even more traumatising for me; as I have done ASSIST training through work and done the one Mental Health First Aid course.

[Kelly]

It's beyond frustrating! One minute he doesn't want anything to do with me, then when he's unwell he's at my front door needing my help. Which of course i will always try to give, even with the verbal abuse. This last episode he was virtually catatonic but at least not abusive, I don't know what's worse. 

[Gaye1]

What do you do when the person believes there is nothing wrong and professionals refused to help unless the person gives permission.  Unless the person is life threatening or themselves or others then nobody will help.  The person is verbally abusive and unable to earn any kind of income and has not applied for governments assistance but living off the generosity of the family who have now become quite sick of it.  The person believed the family owes them big time = not sure for what.   The person is not paying any rent and helps themselves to food when wanted.  The person's partner who also has a mental health problem is enabling in the on-off relationship and family have been warned to stay out of their private lives.   I am at wits end and about to ask them to leave my home.  I don't know what else to do.  People who provide advise, including Psychologist provide primary carer relief but this does not solve the problem

[Former-Member]

With young peope this can be a challenging factor - there is the fact that hormones and developmental changes are happening but they may not be the 'cause' of behaviours. It's important to anyone struggling in a way, to feel validated. I can imagine that is hard for young people sometimes - and equally hard for parents